Dear Friend
We havenât met yet IRL (in real life), but Iâve seen you online andâŠwe need to talk.
You are growing up in a world where privacy is an old-fashioned concept. Almost everything you do is recorded, watched or monitored somehow.
We have cameras on our computers and cell phones, in stores, parks and on the highway. We check in on Facebook and Foursquare and whatever other check-in app you choose. Your phone goes everywhere you go, and the GPS on you phone always knows where you are. Invasion of privacy used to mean my brother read my diary or the teacher intercepted a note about a cute guy and read it in front of the class. Times sure have changed. Maybe youâve been on social media since before you were born. (Did your mom or dad post those ultrasound pics on Facebook or MySpace or Flickr? I thought so.) Your whole life is there.
Yes, this is your world. It seems normal, Iâm sure, because youâve never known anything else. Maybe thatâs why you donât think twice before posting that crazy video on You Tube, or using those words (yes, the dirty ones that make your mother blush) on Twitter, and âOMG, did she really say that to him on Facebook?â
Youâre in a relationship with social media and âItâs Complicated.â
Most of your parents donât get it. (Sorry parents, itâs true.)
Well, let me tell you the hard truth that you donât like to think about:
People are watching.
That creepy guy at the mall?
Yep, heâs online and he can read your Twitter stream.
That jerk you wish you never met?
He can Google you and get your life story in a flash.
Yes, Google indexes your Facebook feeds and your tweets and lots of other things you forget about 5 minutes after you post them.
The Internet never forgets.
I heard on the news that the FCC (people who set the rules for the Internet) have decided itâs OK for people to do social media background checks.
That means that 10 or 15 years from now when you apply for that really cool job that youâve been dreaming about since your were, oh, the age you are right now, the people thinking about hiring you can pull up all those old message you forgot about and WOWâŠwonât they be surprised?
Is that what you want for your future you?
What about right now?
Would you stand up in front of a million people today and do that sexy dance or act like an idiot or talk about how you drank too much when you werenât old enough to drink at all? Really? 1,000,000 people? What about 1,000 people? Or even 15 people? Probably not.
Well, tweet about it and you have the power to reach a lot more than 1 million people. PEOPLE. YOU. DONâT. KNOW.
Just because you donât see them doesnât mean they arenât out there. They are.Ask former Rep. Weiner. Or Gilbert Gottfried. Lots of people saw their messages, and look where it got them.
Itâs not a secret.
Maybe your mom and dad donât know you are on Twitter. You went behind their back and created that account, so no one will ever know except the 1579 friends youâve collected on Facebook (including the ones youâve never met). How many of those people are who they say they are? You can be anyone you want to be online, right? Do you really know your âfriendsâ?
My point is that you need to be CAREFUL online.
Iâm not that old, but the world sure has changed since I was a kid. People used to talk about being âstreet smart,â which meant that you knew a thing or two about life and werenât likely to be taken advantage of or do something that could get you in trouble â and I mean real trouble, not just the kind where you get grounded for a week or have your phone taken away.
The new âstreet smartâ is âsocial smarts.â Thereâs way more trouble online, just waiting for you if youâre careless. And you might not see it coming.
Iâm not trying to scare you, but wake up.
Protect your privacy online. Be careful what you post. Think twice.
Would you want your grandma to see that? Then it probably shouldnât be online.
Itâs really hard to undo social media mistakes. Mom and Dad canât bail you out. You canât buy your way back from a bad reputation. Poor judgement will follow you, because the Internet never forgets and yes, people are watching.
Donât get me wrong. Iâm a big fan of social media. Itâs a great tool for sharing, communicating and staying in touch. But any tool, when itâs misused, can create a lot of damage.
Donât let that happen to you.
Have fun, but be careful out there. Please.
PS: I had been wanting to write an article on this topic for long. Finally got across this. Original Article